Cancer Diary
Happy New Year
I always love the new year. I love a do-over, a chance to recommit to resolutions, an opportunity to imagine a new me. For as long as I can remember I have observed an end of year practice of listing twenty-five things I accomplished in the current year, and twenty-five things I looked forward to accomplishing in the new year. These do not have to be huge accomplishments, some years I counted being a good dog mom or not killing my plants as things I was proud of. Other years there were bigger things - like climbing Mt. Salkantay and trekking into Machu Picchu. This year I was able to count surviving brain surgery and getting through radiation and round one of chemotherapy.
The looking ahead part of this exercise is a little different this year. It’s hard to know what I will or won’t be up to tackling. I know I won’t be going to the gym, but I can commit to walking with a friend. I’ve given up my life-long quest for a thinner body, I’m now trying to maintain a slightly higher weight as protection against chemo weight loss. I could try harder to give up sweets, I know I shouldn’t be eating sugar, but I also feel like I should spoil myself with chocolate. Things I will do are drink more water, get more sleep (daily naps have become a thing), spend time with people I love, and practice gratitude.
I have made my lists. I had almost thirty proud accomplishments in 2025, and I have twenty-three “to-dos” on my 2026 list. I’m leaving the last two spots open for serendipity to strike. The number one spot on my 2026 list is to fight this cancer that so rudely invaded my life in 2025.
I had a post-radiation MRI yesterday, much sooner than my radiation oncologist recommended, but it is a requirement for the clinical trial. I got the report on the MRI in my patient portal this afternoon. Since I never went to med-school and I haven’t watched E.R. or Gray’s Anatomy I had a hard time understanding the report, but when I read, “No evidence of residual or recurrent disease,” I felt as if I could breathe for the first time in weeks. This means I can participate in the clinical trial at NYU Langone.
Things are happening quickly. We leave for New York in a few hours and my appointment for the first trial vaccine is on Monday. I’ll explain the clinical trial in more detail in a future post, but it is an immunotherapy trial that is in phase three and on a fast-track to be FDA approved. This gives me so much to look forward to and to be grateful for in 2026.
I won’t be trekking to Machu Picchu this year, but I do feel encouraged to make plans and set goals now. I still have a long row to hoe, but I have more hope than I did when originally given my diagnosis and prognosis. So, here’s to a happy and healthy 2026 and some major accomplishments that I can list at the end of this year!
